Well . . . Well . . . Well . . . Finally there's a result . . . .

Well, today i was almost late for class again as usual but i never mean to do it as i was doing something with my computer (i wondered what i did till i'm almost late for class). So, i drove off in a dash and hope to reach to the college quickly without any jam. Thank God luckily there's no accident along the journey to the college today but i do saw something disgusting and pity about it, there was a dog which died by the road side. Eventually while passing the dog's corpse, there are a few cars or trucks which go over it. It was really an awful thing to be seen! Then, while i'm outside TPM (at the traffic light), i SMS "someone" and told the "someone" that i need to talk the "someone" later as i could see things not going well since yesterday. We didnt talk for the whole day and everyone has been ignoring me thou.

My first class was PDM (Personal Development & Study Method) today and i was just on time, i reached at 10.30am (which suppose to start at 10.25am). Nicholas (my lecturer) havent started anything yet. So, today's lesson was about the TEAM WORK/GROUP WORK. He spoke alot and explain as detail as possible as usual and somehow what he said has some relation to what i'm facing currently. I was thinking, and thinking and thinking that should i walk off the class for a little while to calm myself down? Luckily, i made a rasional decision, i stayed in the class and listen to all what Nicholas said. Besides, Vicky came and sit with as an accompanying me. He knows what happened and so he sat beside me to keep my accompanying. Thanks for that Vicky.

Then, i was thinking will that "someone" come and talk to me today? I've been thinking will the "someone" talk to me or gonna just leave it like what happened before this? Ignoring it? Others should be more understanding on my condition because i'm being rejected, how do you people out there expect me to break the ice first? I've already being rejected, i'm now extremely terribly shy towards the "someone" and others! Hence, the "someone" wouldnt dare to speak to me as what my friends said that the "someone" was shy about it too. Aight, that's all right as both are gonna face each other everyday. I dont hope that we would be ignoring or not talking to each other anymore as i really treasure the hardship of our current friendship or i would personally name it our "relationship". I work so hard everyday is just to hope for the best to have the best relation with the "someone" in order to form a better relation. After all, in an hour time (2days back), everything has just changed and we were as if ENEMY or as if we dont know each other anymore. I was terribly sad and emotionally abused. I dont want this to be continue and so today is the day where everything has been solved. That "someone" actually came to me and spoke to me, but i dont know how should i face that "someone" (hence i was the one who asked the "someone" to talk to me about it). I was really really shy to speak to the "someone" when the "someone" came to me and nodded the "someone"'s head asking 'what?' Then, we walk off from the place and started talking like normal conversation. Yea, i'm happy with that but...well, i still i like the "someone" and the "someone" is acting as if nothing happened. Should i act as if nothing happen or not? Thank God, we're still talking to each other like before. But seriously, if i could achieve what i want for now, only this, i would have change myself to another and accept the all the love & caring from the "someone". I would do anything for it, if a relationship is worth to be sacrifice (which i think its worth now).

Too bad, i'm aint the lucky one, the "someone" is currently going after another whom the "someone" like. I cannot become the destroyer or the influence in this matter. I will NEVER force the person to be with me, to stay with me or to love me either but what i'm hoping for is the natural feeling. That's what i want and hoping for. Go ahead and continue going after the person you're going after and i'll sit by the corner and wait for the time to come (although if it dont come, i'll still wait).

p/s: Tid är orden. Jag vill vänta för tiden till komme.

-[aLbY]-