D.I.E

Exam is tomorrow throughout the whole week, I'm not prepared at all. So one word to described, "DIE"! In year 3 now, if I didn't do well, I'll have screw my bachelor degree class. And I can't resist to just DIE off! It's too stressed, and another thing, I'm so much of suffocation now WITHOUT YOU. I've nobody, I'm nobody... :'( to anybody... I never deserve what I deserve, how pathetic am I, how cheap am I, how sad am I, how sick am I...I'm such worthless and full with loneliness but others full with enjoyment. I didn't study at all yesterday, after the gym I head straight to my granduncle's funeral till 11.30pm, then I couldn't study and wasn't happy at all, I went to the mamak and sat alone till 4.40am, then my bro and cousin came by till 6am! Looked, how pathetic am I! After all these years, I made myself to stayed away from everybody to avoid any gossips, eventually...gossips never stops and it never failed breaking people's heart. Even though the gossip is finally clarified it's untrue, I am still considered as an "outsider"...sucking everything up alone, and alone.. I've been good, been trying to be good, changing to be good, learned from the past experience, learn from mistakes, learn from being stabbed, learn from breaking apart but......nevertheless DIE is the word which I would described to myself although it's stupid or irrational, but it's too suffocating till I'm falling soon, collapsing soon... :'(

p/s: Goodluck for the examination Alby, may you pass your exam with flying colors if possible!

The deadly,
-[aLbY]-